Who else finds it extremely difficult to just look in the mirror and let yourself know that you are beautiful, strong and loved?
I suffer with low self esteem & anxiety and I have always found it hard to open up & love me for me. Growing up with a critical Mother was soul crushing. I’ve had to constantly ask myself ‘are you enough?’ Living with this has naturally made me more of a giver. I am always looking out for someone other than myself & it has cost me dearly, mentally, physically & financially.
Having my sweet babies has taught me a love like no other, but most importantly, what am I teaching them if I don’t try & love myself more? Put myself first for once? When I realised this with my first born I sought therapy and opened up. I addressed many insecurities, how those insecurities came about & how to now tackle them.
I would always go above and beyond for those in my life I thought cared about me, be it family or friends but in reality they were only looking out for themselves with some even going as far as taking advantage of my kindness. Listen! There’s nothing wrong with caring about someone and wanting what’s best for them, but draw a line. There is only so much you can do for someone else but there’s so much you can give and do for you!
27 years later, I make sure I say ‘no’ more for me, not to go above and beyond often, I make time for me; simple self reflections, take mental note of any accomplishments (small or big), I take walks, (totally obsessed with walks at the moment, especially with what 2020 has to offer, we need to BREATHE), practicing yoga, even things as small as running to the bathroom and eating a chocolate bar in peace! You deserve it all Mama.
I want my children to know their worth, to appreciate themselves. I want them to know, no one is perfect, & to have the confidence to accept any flaws they may have. I want them to know that they are loved for exactly who they are. Just like any Mother, I would not want my children ever feeling how I’ve felt at my lowest, I will forever let them know that they are beautiful, that they are worthy, I’d want them to be strong, courageous and confident in who they are! Above all, they will know to love themselves.
My children have saved my life, and I love myself so much more because of them.