If you’re reading this, your probably thinking oh my goodness, what haven’t I been told! There are many different things I wish someone had pre-warned me about so I’ve jotted a few down and hope these help you;
To kick things off I wanted to start by sharing a bit about me. I’m a first time mum and had my little girl, Nelly in July 2020 during lockdown, my partner was anxiously waiting outside the hospital for two days until I was 4cm dilated. In all honesty, I had a fantastic birth compare to some ladies. But after we left the hospital, your left to your own devices, I guess COVID didn’t really help but if you’re due anytime soon please know that all the emotions you feel are absolutely OK!
Let’s start with the most important thing that wasn’t mentioned to me after I had Nelly, HORMONES! They’re wild, straight away...You feel so much love, anxiety and anger all at the same time. Alongside emotions you become over protective, straight away! For me it was “nobody is holding my baby” “you can’t touch my baby if you haven’t wash your hands” “OH MY GOODNESS GERMS” I wish somebody had told me that the way I was feeling was and is ok! Your hormones are trying to rebalance and adapt to your body again without a little one growing inside.
The second thing will not apply to everyone, but it did for me. If you tear during labour, no matter how little or large make sure you get yourself a jug that you can pour warm water onto your private area with while going to the loo – after a tear going for a wee tends to sting and some warm water being poured just gives a sense of relief that is needed when you’re so tender.
While we’re on the subject of toilet, nobody prepares you for the scare you feel when you need to do the duty (no2). I was so anxious that I had to google how to do a no 2 after a baby (I wish I was joking!) but my best advice is to be nice and calm, take something in the loo with you to take your mind off it and do not rush! YOU CAN DO IT
So after my bundle of joy came into the world, I just expected my body to bounce back to pre-pregnancy. As fantastic as the body is allowing you to grow the most precious thing you’ll ever have. There is this stigma around the bounce back which is absolute rubbish! Keep them pre-pregnancy jeans in the closet until you and your body are ready to try them on.
During pregnancy I was extremely fortunate to not get many stretch marks, I brought into a great stretch mark cream and it kept them at bay. What I wasn’t told, was that stretch marks can make a sneaky appearance after baby is born – so there I was thinking great I got away with little stretch marks until a week later and my back was covered! Luckily enough I’ve embraced them and feel so happy and blessed with my body to not really care. But I do wish someone mentioned to carry on using the cream after birth!
And lastly, the one last thing I wasn’t told after having a baby was how it’s ok to not have you stuff together! It’s ok to forget a muslin, bib or even a dummy. It’s more than ok for your baby to cry in public and it’s ok for you to have a cry! I was much under the illusion that now I’m a mum I should know exactly what I want to do, with whom and what not. I couldn’t of been further from what I thought now. Nelly and I learn new things about each other every day, and I wouldn’t trade that in for the world.
You are amazing, you are strong and you are a mamma! Take each day and step as it comes and always remember YOU know what’s best for your baby