by Nikhe

Instagra-mama

Positives of Instagram for a mom like me

I have a confession to make: I am having an Insta-dilemma;  In one way I love Instagram; there are many inspiring people, I find amazing things to do or places to go. I use it for activities, for recipes and for new idea’s for braiding my daughter her hair. I love to see the beautiful photo’s from people all over the world, I love to be able to see photo’s from back home, or my favourite city even though I am so far away. I love to read stories from people, I love how this medium can become some sort of support group for many people.

I love how other peoples positivity can give other people the final push in the right direction. I love to follow people’s journeys through life.

How much should you share about yourself on instagram?

But Instagram also eats me, annoys me, makes me uncertain in ways. My dilemma’s? ‘How much should or should I not share about my family, how much time do I want to invest, is it ok towards my children to expose them on the world wide web without their consent, should I show what I really feel at times.  Should I show how messy my house really is, how I never have time for myself and that I cant even remember when I have last been to a hairdresser’. 

I struggle with motherhood, I find it exhausting and difficult at times and I have moments where I wish I could just run out of the house for a day or 2. I feel like I lost myself in motherhood, that the Me is gone, the person before kids and marriage. I feel like all my life is just serving others at the moment. 

Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE MY KIDS (and my husband) and I wouldn’t want to miss them ever! But sometimes I just want to feel ME again.

I want to loose that 20kg I am carrying with me since becoming a mom, but I am often so tired that even if I try to watch my calorie intake and do work-outs , on days that I feel miserably tired the only thing I can think about at quick sugars, sweets, snacks. Should I show all this???

 

Mom’s Instagram Struggles (Always comparing)

This brings me to the next point of what I don’t like about Instagram and what Instagram seems to be full of: The perfect Instagra-mama’s. Mama’s that seem to have it all; their lives look so clean, so well under control, so glamorous, so easy, so everything that I am not.

Their kids are little angels, they can buy new things every day, they have all the latest gadgets, their kids can start their own toyshops with the amount of toys they have, their kids wardrobes are bigger than the queen,  they can go out, they have the most glamorous BFF’s and they always look so perfect (even without make-up). 

How seeing an instagram feed of “Perfect Mamas” affects other moms

Am I jealous? Maybe a little sometimes, but probably not . I am just annoyed and also intrigued that a few people want to make the rest of the world think that this is real life.

Do I think they are better moms because they get their kids new things every day? NOT AT ALL, I believe that “things” don’t make children happy and that if they receive something on special occasions only will make them appreciate things more. I also think it’s very important that children get to understand the value of things (toys, food, activities) and give them an understanding of what wealth and poverty is .

Do I think these mama’s don’t have the same struggles that I have? Nope, I do believe there is a human behind each and every one of them.

But why do I keep following their insta-accounts if they annoy me so much? Good question. I guess we all have a few of those accounts on our list. On a daily basis I tell myself to un-follow them and focus on accounts that give me positive energy but something keeps me watching their stories, posts and reels. I am intrigued how this apparently sells and I am in a way curious about what’s coming next.

So for now they are on my list and I will continue my daily insta-dilemma’s and my motherhood struggles.

Read more of real mums experiences with motherhood and related struggles & tips